Through the Doubt- Cynthia Wang
Cynthia Wang, a dancer for nearly a decade, is a 9th grader at the Harker School in San Jose, California.
As a child, I was never the dance prodigy, but when I danced, I felt a sense of love and belonging. Nevertheless, love alone doesn’t always lead you to success. Eight years ago, with every note that rang through the air, I feebly controlled my arms and legs in the back row, attempting to mimic those in front of me, who were graceful and elegant.
Four years ago, when a catastrophe hit the world, I fell subordinate to it. With the countless online classes, ballet in front of screens, and teams that fell apart, it all felt meaningless. I would lie to my teachers and hide from the camera, using puberty as an excuse to run from my responsibilities.
Yet the moment I returned to stepping into the classrooms that were filled with nostalgia, my cleverness that helped me escape from hard work became a poisonous snake that came to bite me back. The strangers around me and my numerous clumsy steps constantly reminded me of my faults. I set my only goal to be the one in the corner of the last row, only working hard with the purpose of not standing out.
Unexpectedly, when I thought the back row would be the apex of my dance journey, I was presented with a chance to perform a solo, where all eyes lay on me and only me.
Going to my first solo class, my expectations were barely above the ground. I knew others expected nothing of me and I agreed with them. I began to avoid competitions, never wanting to perform in front of my peers. I almost dreaded class, afraid to disappoint my teacher. Thankfully, it all changed the first time I stepped on stage, with the lights shining on me and the audience as a dark blur.
I remember it vividly. When I finally built the courage to perform for the first time, I felt strangely calm. There was no stage fright, panic, or anything else at all. The music that I heard numerous times rang loudly in my ears while my heart pounded in response to the music. It was a strange feeling where my movements matched every note oddly perfectly and my body echoed my muscle memory on its own.
Even at that moment, my future achievements felt unthinkable. Winning regionals seemed like such an infeasible feat, nevermind the idea of becoming a national champion.
With the past two years I spent dedicated to dance, I learned something fairly simple: hard work builds the foundation for success, but enjoyment fuels the pursuit of success. Behind every sport, there are tiresome and loathful classes that challenge your will; yet many still push through, just for that one special moment. And perhaps, the only one doubting you is you.
